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Are You Your Bridesmaids' Worst Nightmare?

Updated: Aug 11, 2020

Your Wedding – A Joyful (but often stressful) Time

There are so many things you need to do in preparation for your wedding day that it can be overwhelming. Some stress is inevitable, but sometimes brides can become too demanding and a over controlling. This is usually due to the whirlwind of the wedding tasks at hand that has their heads spinning. After reading this article, you just may find that you are becoming a BBB (Bride Behaving Badly). It could happen.

Your Maid of Honor and bridesmaids are there to support you from your engagement to the day you say, “I do.” They are your sisters, cousins, friends, and sometimes even your daughters. They make sure your train has been flared out perfectly as you walk down the aisle, hold your bouquet as you take your vows, and even pass you a tissue or two so that your mascara doesn’t run. They work hard to plan a bridal shower you will love and spend quite a bit of their hard-earned money on you—the bride—for your special day. They are honored that you chose them to share one of the most significant times in your life, so it might be a good idea to try to not become a BBB. Here are some tipoffs that it’s happening to you!

#1 – High-Roller Bride

Unless you live in a community like Beverly Hills, it may not be appropriate or considerate to ask your bridesmaids to shell out an exorbitant amount of money on overpriced designer bridesmaids dresses and Louis Vuitton shoes. You may have caviar tastes, but you’ll also need to consider the overall financial situation of your bridal party. Your friends and family will love you even more if you are a bride that’s considerate of others’ spending limits.

#2 – Ms. Bossy Pants

Could you be asking your bridesmaids do an enormous amount of running around for you, shouting out orders, and making demands on a continual basis? If this sounds like you, resentment could start to brew. Sure, they will be glad to pitch in and help you when you really need them, but you might save some friendships if you hire wedding assistants or enlist the help of a wedding planner to do some of those tiring things.

#3 – Clone-maids

Tradition has it that your bridal party should have a similar look. Many brides are steering away from exact look-alike attire, but you may like your bridal party’s attire be coordinated and similar. The question is, how far should you take it? Let’s say you want all of your bridesmaids to wear black eyeliner, deep smoky purple eye shadow, or head to the tanning salon so everyone will be bronze for the wedding. Or, you’re thinking of asking them not to cut their hair for a year so everyone can pull their hair up in a fancy bun. What you may not be taking into consideration is their individual personal preferences. Having a coordinated look for your wedding party is totally fine, but try to be flexible enough to listen to their concerns. Allow them the freedom to be themselves and feel comfortable. After all, all eyes will be on them also as you all walk down the aisle.

#5 – Oops. Just Kidding

Once you have asked your Maid of Honor and bridesmaids to be in your wedding, a good way to possibly lose a friend is to change your mind and un-invite them to be in your bridal party. Let’s say you only want six bridesmaids—maybe because your finance can only drum up six guys to be in the wedding party. You’ve made up your mind, asked your closest friends and family to be part of your special day. Then, to your surprise, your fiancé informs you that his stepsister told his mother that she will go off the deep end if she is not invited to be in your bridal party. You then make the really bad decision to ‘fire’ your cousin (who your Mom made you ask) to make room for your soon-to-be stepsister. Making the decision to ask someone to leave your wedding party (unless they become toxic) would definitely put you in the BBB category.

#6 – All Hale the Drama Queen

Hopefully, most of your bridesmaids (if not all) are happy to lend a sympathetic ear and a shoulder to lean on in times of wedding planning trouble. But—they are not your personal therapists. For example, if you and your finance are in a constant state of arguing, breaking up and getting back together, or you are having upsetting disagreements with someone in your bridal party, your job is to handle the situation the best you can without making an entire group of women your 24/7 therapists. Try to keep gossiping and drama to a minimum. More importantly, if your relationship with your fiancé is so tumultuous that you are calling or texting your bridesmaids at all hours of the night, maybe turning to a professional counselor to help you work out your issues with your partner would help put things in perspective, solve your issues, and take the burden off of your wedding party.


Stress can make even the most considerate person act in ways that are not typical of their personality. If you are a ‘bride of endearment’, friends, family, and especially your partner will pick up on your inner calm and everyone involved will have a wonderful wedding experience. The wedding planners at Webster Golf Club can assist you in relieving some of the pressures wedding day details. Their services are complimentary when you book your wedding at Webster Golf Weddings & Events. Call us today at 585.265.1920, Ext. 3.

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